football/soccer joke

David Lynch tells a groaner of football/soccer joke.

A Sunday league football team is so desperate for players that one Sunday they are forced to play with a chicken in their team. Surprisingly, the chicken has a brilliant first half. One minute it's clearing off its own line, the next putting in a perfect cross. At half time all the teammates are very pleased and everyone runs back onto the pitch for the second half.
On the way the ref starts chatting to the chicken.
"Great first half mate." says the ref.
"Thanks," replies the chicken, "I try to keep myself fit. It's difficult finding time, but I do an hour in the gym each morning before work."
"What do you do?" asks the ref.
"I'm a chartered accountant," comes the reply.
At which point the referee brandishes the red card and sends the chicken off. The bemused teammates gather round and start complaining to the referee.
"Sorry lads," says the referee, "I had no choice. Professional fowl."